Thursday, January 1, 2009
WARNING
Please do NOT look at any older posts. I'm dead serious about this. Those things are majorly embarrassing! Holy cow.
The Plan
It is now the new year. Yes, the new year. 365 days in 2008. Now I have approximately the same amount this year: 2009. That is, if I don't die first. Heh. Which is a rather unlikely, but not impossible event. Every year I always try to do something especially exciting or different to welcome the new year. But this year... Well, I guess I just didn't really have anything planned. I sang the “Auld Lang Syne” song and watched my Grandpa and Grandma's tree burn in a explosion of flame (exciting, but not new). The same thing I've done the last sixteen years of my life. Each year the same, no less exciting, always a bit surreal, but still very present.
The present:.... Hmm. There's this quote in Kung Fu Panda, it goes like this, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.” The present is such an interesting topic; perhaps because you're tired of talking about the past, cannot know the future, and so you must dwell on the present; it's the only thing to think upon. This could be part of my “plan”, dwelling in the present...
I'll admit, freely, that I am a dreamer. I am constantly thinking about the future and what it will hold for me. I love to think of me and my husband and my cute little boy with curly blond hair and bright blue eyes! Yes! The future! What will it bring? No one knows for sure, but we can only guess and dream about it's surprises. I dream a lot. And not only about the real, but also the surreal. I like to think I'm part of a greater scheme. Something that goes beyond my: travel around the world, meet prince charming, marry prince charming, have little baby prince charming's and princesses, and live life with vitality and happiness. I like to think that my God out there is planning something big. Something really big. And I get to be the main character in that show. I get to be the star. That's my dream. And you know what? I think that dream has a very good probability of actually happening. It's formulating, day by day, dream by dream, step by step. Slowly. Surely. I am working towards something greater than that that I've ever planned, or dreamed for that matter. All a part of a greater plan. A greater plan. God's Great Plan. Which is, hopefully, My Great Plan. Because I want my plans to be in accordance with God's. Psh. I laugh. You should too. I just started talking about my “plans”. Hah! Like whatever I plan is really going to make it in the long haul. That's a joke. You laugh.
Plans. Another quote to refer to, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” Ach! But it's too true isn't it? We, little ants on a round green and blue ball, scurry around and concoct outrageous dreams that turn into “plans” that we “plan” to accomplish. The funny thing is: most of us never make our beds in the morning, much less accomplish our life plans! Although, that is not to say that we shouldn't try to make something of our lives. Plan them, that is. In fact, I'm definitely one for making something of life. Creating goals. I think without goals people are lost. There's this confused compass inside all humans that searches for direction, but cannot go about walking without some form of a plan, some definite direction: go west, go south. Those who don't make plans sit on their bums fighting work they deem “unnecessary”. Part of a plan's job is to motivate.
Many a noval would lay unfinished, unpublished, and unknown if not for some kind of motivation motivating the author. It seems that the motivation often comes from having a plan; a purpose. Then of course you must have someone that believes in your plan. Otherwise it's all useless. Because as much as we'd like to pretend we don't care what everyone thinks, the truth is, we do; excessively. Without attention our unique skills are completely wasted. Without someone else to appreciate your work, it's pointless. Sure you can enjoy it to some extent on your own, but if you can't reveal it with a kindred spirit, you're work has no meaning. It's like when you have something amazing happen to you and you need to tell somebody. Even though it's especially dear to your heart and nobody else is going to appreciate it quite as much as you, you still need to get some type of conformation that, indeed, it is absolutely splendid and thrilling, and congratulations! Nobody wants to be alone when celebrating something great! We humans weren't created to thrive on our thoughts alone. Thank goodness.
Back to the plan. I've thought about creating a year plan. Sort of a guide to what I want to achieve this 2009. I know I probably won't live up to my plan's original standard, but at least there was some format (in the beginning) to the time spent in my year. I suppose the more structured, the more I can enjoy the freedom within those set walls. Wow. I'm starting to sound like a fanatic, huh?
The thing is, I'm a lover of life! That sounds rather vague, doesn't it? Well let me explain. I mean a lover of life in smaller terms than you're picturing. The type of life I'm talking about is the little stuff. The moments where all cares are out of sight, and all that I can see is endless opportunity. I mean those moments when you look at a little baby, the perfect “O” it's little lips shape, the little round eyes that shine with innocence, and the little button nose... I mean the moment when you know, and I mean really know, that He loves you; with everything He has, everything He had, and everything He ever will have. I mean the moment when you catch your brother and sisters eye when you're laughing so hard you can't breath, and your heart sky rockets with happiness until you could touch the stars. I mean the moment when you look up into that perfect someone's eyes, and you understand what the word “love” really means. I mean the moment when you look outside into a silent night muffled by mountains of white snow. I mean the moment when your basketball team works hard all year and the last game of the season you all kneel down, pray and thank God. I mean the moment when the sky breathes it's light out over a field of topaz grasses swaying west to east. I mean those moments. Those are the ones that count. It's those moments that I live for. They create what I like to call: my life.
Dwell in the present, dream to your hearts content, make plans (don't expect to keep them), and love life.
Happy New Year! Live it like you mean it. I know I will.
Always,
Ellie
The present:.... Hmm. There's this quote in Kung Fu Panda, it goes like this, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.” The present is such an interesting topic; perhaps because you're tired of talking about the past, cannot know the future, and so you must dwell on the present; it's the only thing to think upon. This could be part of my “plan”, dwelling in the present...
I'll admit, freely, that I am a dreamer. I am constantly thinking about the future and what it will hold for me. I love to think of me and my husband and my cute little boy with curly blond hair and bright blue eyes! Yes! The future! What will it bring? No one knows for sure, but we can only guess and dream about it's surprises. I dream a lot. And not only about the real, but also the surreal. I like to think I'm part of a greater scheme. Something that goes beyond my: travel around the world, meet prince charming, marry prince charming, have little baby prince charming's and princesses, and live life with vitality and happiness. I like to think that my God out there is planning something big. Something really big. And I get to be the main character in that show. I get to be the star. That's my dream. And you know what? I think that dream has a very good probability of actually happening. It's formulating, day by day, dream by dream, step by step. Slowly. Surely. I am working towards something greater than that that I've ever planned, or dreamed for that matter. All a part of a greater plan. A greater plan. God's Great Plan. Which is, hopefully, My Great Plan. Because I want my plans to be in accordance with God's. Psh. I laugh. You should too. I just started talking about my “plans”. Hah! Like whatever I plan is really going to make it in the long haul. That's a joke. You laugh.
Plans. Another quote to refer to, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” Ach! But it's too true isn't it? We, little ants on a round green and blue ball, scurry around and concoct outrageous dreams that turn into “plans” that we “plan” to accomplish. The funny thing is: most of us never make our beds in the morning, much less accomplish our life plans! Although, that is not to say that we shouldn't try to make something of our lives. Plan them, that is. In fact, I'm definitely one for making something of life. Creating goals. I think without goals people are lost. There's this confused compass inside all humans that searches for direction, but cannot go about walking without some form of a plan, some definite direction: go west, go south. Those who don't make plans sit on their bums fighting work they deem “unnecessary”. Part of a plan's job is to motivate.
Many a noval would lay unfinished, unpublished, and unknown if not for some kind of motivation motivating the author. It seems that the motivation often comes from having a plan; a purpose. Then of course you must have someone that believes in your plan. Otherwise it's all useless. Because as much as we'd like to pretend we don't care what everyone thinks, the truth is, we do; excessively. Without attention our unique skills are completely wasted. Without someone else to appreciate your work, it's pointless. Sure you can enjoy it to some extent on your own, but if you can't reveal it with a kindred spirit, you're work has no meaning. It's like when you have something amazing happen to you and you need to tell somebody. Even though it's especially dear to your heart and nobody else is going to appreciate it quite as much as you, you still need to get some type of conformation that, indeed, it is absolutely splendid and thrilling, and congratulations! Nobody wants to be alone when celebrating something great! We humans weren't created to thrive on our thoughts alone. Thank goodness.
Back to the plan. I've thought about creating a year plan. Sort of a guide to what I want to achieve this 2009. I know I probably won't live up to my plan's original standard, but at least there was some format (in the beginning) to the time spent in my year. I suppose the more structured, the more I can enjoy the freedom within those set walls. Wow. I'm starting to sound like a fanatic, huh?
The thing is, I'm a lover of life! That sounds rather vague, doesn't it? Well let me explain. I mean a lover of life in smaller terms than you're picturing. The type of life I'm talking about is the little stuff. The moments where all cares are out of sight, and all that I can see is endless opportunity. I mean those moments when you look at a little baby, the perfect “O” it's little lips shape, the little round eyes that shine with innocence, and the little button nose... I mean the moment when you know, and I mean really know, that He loves you; with everything He has, everything He had, and everything He ever will have. I mean the moment when you catch your brother and sisters eye when you're laughing so hard you can't breath, and your heart sky rockets with happiness until you could touch the stars. I mean the moment when you look up into that perfect someone's eyes, and you understand what the word “love” really means. I mean the moment when you look outside into a silent night muffled by mountains of white snow. I mean the moment when your basketball team works hard all year and the last game of the season you all kneel down, pray and thank God. I mean the moment when the sky breathes it's light out over a field of topaz grasses swaying west to east. I mean those moments. Those are the ones that count. It's those moments that I live for. They create what I like to call: my life.
Dwell in the present, dream to your hearts content, make plans (don't expect to keep them), and love life.
Happy New Year! Live it like you mean it. I know I will.
Always,
Ellie
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Summer has gone and passed...
I can't quite comprehend it, really. It seems like just days ago where I was scrambling to finish up a paper that was due... It's strange how days and moments can pass so quickly without one noticeing it. I had a wonderful summer, though! And I'm really, actually, looking quite forward to the school year. It'll be different. A heck of a lot of change, that's for sure!
Attending Triad, for one will be a change. For those of you who don't know, Triad is a Christian private school in Klamath Falls, and it will be the first "school" I've ever attended, save homeschool. :) I have mixed feelings about attending Triad. I mean, I'm pretty excited about being a part of such a nice school, and getting involved in sports and the like, but at the same time I'm REALLY going to miss the long days at home where I get my school done early and have the whole rest of the day to read and do whatever. It'll be different. A whole lot of change.
Whoops, I gotta go get ready for volleyball practice. Yep! :) I'm joining the JV Volleyball team at Triad! Cool, eh? I think so, anyways. Okay.
Till further notice I remain,
Ellie May Brain
Attending Triad, for one will be a change. For those of you who don't know, Triad is a Christian private school in Klamath Falls, and it will be the first "school" I've ever attended, save homeschool. :) I have mixed feelings about attending Triad. I mean, I'm pretty excited about being a part of such a nice school, and getting involved in sports and the like, but at the same time I'm REALLY going to miss the long days at home where I get my school done early and have the whole rest of the day to read and do whatever. It'll be different. A whole lot of change.
Whoops, I gotta go get ready for volleyball practice. Yep! :) I'm joining the JV Volleyball team at Triad! Cool, eh? I think so, anyways. Okay.
Till further notice I remain,
Ellie May Brain
Saturday, June 21, 2008
I need prayer
Hey everyone!
I don't know if all of you know, but this summer I'm going to be a part of an AMF summer missionary group! :) We have about 6 teens in the group and a director, and what we do is go around to various camps in Oregon and help out with whatever is needed: cooking, recreation, music, cleaning, etc. Anyway, today (Saturday) I take off for the first of my many week long summer camps. I'm actually a little anxious, and I know it's going to be hard being away from home almost all summer. :( If you guys wouldn't mind praying for me, I would appreciate it more than words can express. Thank you so much!
Love you all!
God Bless!
-Ellie May
I don't know if all of you know, but this summer I'm going to be a part of an AMF summer missionary group! :) We have about 6 teens in the group and a director, and what we do is go around to various camps in Oregon and help out with whatever is needed: cooking, recreation, music, cleaning, etc. Anyway, today (Saturday) I take off for the first of my many week long summer camps. I'm actually a little anxious, and I know it's going to be hard being away from home almost all summer. :( If you guys wouldn't mind praying for me, I would appreciate it more than words can express. Thank you so much!
Love you all!
God Bless!
-Ellie May
Monday, June 2, 2008
The Princess Bride
Some of the quotes from this movie keep running through my head. I thought I'd share a few of them with you. :)
Buttercup: You can die too for all I care.
[pushes him down a high hill]
Westley: AS... YOU... WISH.
Buttercup: Oh my sweet Westley what have I done?
[throws herself down the hill]
*
Inigo Montoya: Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Count Rugen: Stop saying that!
*
Miracle Max: You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.
*
Vizzini: INCONCEIVABLE.
*
Vizzini: HE DIDN'T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE.
Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
*
Inigo Montoya: I donna suppose you could speed things up?
Westley: If you're in such a hurry, you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.
Inigo Montoya: I could do that. I have some rope up here, but I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Westley: That does put a damper on our relationship.
*
Inigo Montoya: I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers on your right hand?
Westley: Do you always begin conversations this way?
*
Inigo Montoya: You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.
Westley: You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die.
*
Buttercup: You mock my pain.
Westley: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.
*
Vizzini: I can't compete with you physically, and you're no match for my brains.
Westley: You're that smart?
Vizzini: Let me put it this way. Have you ever heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?
Westley: Yes.
Vizzini: Morons.
*
Buttercup: You're the Dread Pirate Roberts, admit it.
Westley: With pride. What can I do for you?
Buttercup: You can die slowly, cut into a thousand pieces.
Westley: Tsk, tsk. That's hardly complementary Highness. Why loose your venom on me?
Buttercup: You killed my love.
Westley: It's possible. I kill a lot of people.
*
Dread Pirate Roberts: Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning.
Buttercup: You can die too for all I care.
[pushes him down a high hill]
Westley: AS... YOU... WISH.
Buttercup: Oh my sweet Westley what have I done?
[throws herself down the hill]
*
Inigo Montoya: Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Count Rugen: Stop saying that!
*
Miracle Max: You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.
*
Vizzini: INCONCEIVABLE.
*
Vizzini: HE DIDN'T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE.
Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
*
Inigo Montoya: I donna suppose you could speed things up?
Westley: If you're in such a hurry, you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.
Inigo Montoya: I could do that. I have some rope up here, but I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Westley: That does put a damper on our relationship.
*
Inigo Montoya: I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers on your right hand?
Westley: Do you always begin conversations this way?
*
Inigo Montoya: You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.
Westley: You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die.
*
Buttercup: You mock my pain.
Westley: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.
*
Vizzini: I can't compete with you physically, and you're no match for my brains.
Westley: You're that smart?
Vizzini: Let me put it this way. Have you ever heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?
Westley: Yes.
Vizzini: Morons.
*
Buttercup: You're the Dread Pirate Roberts, admit it.
Westley: With pride. What can I do for you?
Buttercup: You can die slowly, cut into a thousand pieces.
Westley: Tsk, tsk. That's hardly complementary Highness. Why loose your venom on me?
Buttercup: You killed my love.
Westley: It's possible. I kill a lot of people.
*
Dread Pirate Roberts: Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
The Ground is Being Rewarded
Rain, rain, go away, come again another day...
It's been raining practically non-stop over here. The grass is all squishy from drinking it in, and everything is clean and pure-looking from the continueous washing.
Things are getting ready to end over here. But before they end and life gets easy, it's gonna get a whole lot more diffecult. Dance has only a few weeks to go and then it's over. School will be done on the tenth... That'll be so nice.
You lovely people all need to come to my dance performance on the 13th and 14th of June @ 7:30 both nights. I probably told you all this before, didn't I? Geeze, what can I say? dance has been such a huge part of my year.
Today will be the test. Can I go through this evening and last? Wednesday night is always my challenging night, because that's when I have the most dance classes, which are the most challenging ones.
I need to stop worrying. Man.
It's been raining practically non-stop over here. The grass is all squishy from drinking it in, and everything is clean and pure-looking from the continueous washing.
Things are getting ready to end over here. But before they end and life gets easy, it's gonna get a whole lot more diffecult. Dance has only a few weeks to go and then it's over. School will be done on the tenth... That'll be so nice.
You lovely people all need to come to my dance performance on the 13th and 14th of June @ 7:30 both nights. I probably told you all this before, didn't I? Geeze, what can I say? dance has been such a huge part of my year.
Today will be the test. Can I go through this evening and last? Wednesday night is always my challenging night, because that's when I have the most dance classes, which are the most challenging ones.
I need to stop worrying. Man.
Friday, May 16, 2008
There's A Place In My Memory...
Every time I walk our hill leading up to our house, I subconsciously take a deep breath and pause at a certain place. I just realized for the first time that I was doing this yesterday when I took a deep breath and could not yet smell the flowers. In the summer the chokecherry blossoms on the trees surrounding that area are in pearly white bloom, and it's like breaking into a world of vanilla senses when you walk in the cove. I was expecting them. The blossoms aren't here yet, but they'll come. I’ll be ready.
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